Creativity and Control : Enemies or Frenemies?
For the longest time, I used to say that I “wasn’t creative”, (although I chose an art college over a traditional one). The way I saw it, my desire for control was much too great, and my graphic design—it wasn’t “art”. My skills were more based on geometry and my love for order. I believed for a long while that creativity and control were two opposites at the ends of a spectrum that would never meet.
All of the words that find themselves at the opposite of creativity are the ones that have been used to describe me—both internally and externally—Type A, organized, perfectionist, (those are the kind ones anyway, ha!). I thrived when I created systems and spreadsheets that helped keep things in order and easy for people to access, understand, digest. Creating systems always felt like they were based on the need for control. And the need for control is viewed as rigid, which can appear as the antithesis of creativity. Creativity seems to flow—like water in a stream—or like the rhythm of a beat, while control can seem tight and suffocating.
It took a long while for me to realize that my knack for creating systems and spreadsheets was an expression of creativity on their own.
When it really started to connect for me was at the start of my recent second act, rooted in my passion and love for food. On one extreme you have meal planning—every single Saturday or Sunday, you stand in your kitchen and you plan your meals for the next seven days. On the other extreme, you have the empty fridge owner that wanders grocery store aisles (or Door Dash menus) to see what tickles their fancy at the moment. While neither is the life for me, it is where they intersect that I have found my next path of service.
So if you are a perfectionist-in-recovery, like myself. I challenge you to find the area of your structure that is actually a creative expression. You just might find another chapter in your story.
